When the radio came on this morning, I heard the guy going through a list of school closings and early dismissals. I thought, "Hmm . . . the weather must be bad. Guess I'll work from home today." So I got up and got in the shower and generally went about my morning routine.

When I walked out of the bedroom and saw outside for the first time, there was snow all right. Right in the piles where J.P.* had left it the last time he shoveled. There were no flakes dropping from the sky. There was no coating of snow on the bare grass or street. In fact, the sun is trying to shine through the clouds as I write this. Are we calling off school on a count of OVERCAST???

I know, I know . . . I sound like a cranky old lady who talks about walking uphill (both ways!) to school through waist-deep snow when she was a child. But come on, people!

It seems people in Pennsylvania have to be home before it STARTS snowing. Like their cars won't operate once the flakes are falling. And if it happens to start snowing before the evening rush hour, you might as well camp out at the office because a 15-minute trip will take you twelve hours. It's not uncommon for cars to run out of gas on the highway during a snowfall (note that I didn't say snowstorm) because traffic is at a standstill for hours.

Minnesotans are pretty crappy drivers. They won't move over so you can merge onto the highway. They love to drive 60 mph in the left lane in an effort to be left lane vigilantes, keeping those behind them at or near the posted speed limit. But I'll say one thing for them: they know how to drive in the snow.

Time to make my commute to the kitchen table. I bet I can do it in 30 seconds or less.

*J.P. is my husband, the Japanese Polack. Did you think we'd actually pay someone to shovel with that shiny new snowblower that's in our garage??

This entry was posted on Thursday, February 24, 2005 at 7:46 AM.